midterm

I have a very easy time critiquing others counseling in my mind than I do actually counseling myself. Perhaps that's true of many people.

One thing I was noticing during most of the evening is that everyone's counseling was akin to an interrogation: question, question, question, question. I feel like in the past couple weeks my eyes were opened, from a combination of Paul's demonstration in class and the conversations listed in the Motivational Interviewing text: much of both of those was more geared towards reflective listening, and allowing the client to 're-hear' what they've been saying. Much more summarizing, reframining, etc.

I was trying to model this in my counseling with Bill: I asked a few questions, but I had two main objectives: 1) move away from the barrage of questions that had been thrown at him, and 2) focus as best as possible on his primary motivation which, at this point, was to stay out of jail.

The end of the closing was pretty bad, honestly - I kind of faded out, and didn't know exactly what to say at the end. Part of that I know came from the fact that I know Bill, and I kind of felt like I sort of "broke character" at the very end when I got up to shake his hand. I also didn't know what to say, because I don't know how the communications would work in that type of situation: would treatment center folks be in touch with him, or would his lawyer be in touch with us, or would Bill communicate with his lawyer AND with us, or...?? So I wasn't quite sure what to say.

He threw me for a loop when I had said he may have to cut down on either drinking or driving, and he chose driving. I was shocked enough that I laughed. However, I also realize after the fact that this is where the client is right now, and I would need to work with him right there - perhaps try to get him to see that cutting back on driving may be difficult given his work or something, but laughing I don't think is an appropriate response. That may have been my response also as my classmates also laughed. But Bill was quite serious when he said that, and there's nothing wrong with that if it's his truth - it just means as a counselor I'd have to meet him right there and work with that. It's telling about the importance of drinking to him, though, and as such is a valuable piece of information.

I was happy with the encounter really. I stayed away from the interrogation idea, and stayed more with summarizing / reframing type statements. I hope to continue those ideas in our next triads.

Week 5 - Feb 5

Counseling triad tonight was challenging, in a really excellent way. Not using questions was really tough. I found myself repeating many of the same statements over-and-over again. I never realized how much I relied on questions. I know that most of the 'intents and responses' we have are statements, but I think in this type of situation my natural reaction is to ask questions. I was a little bummed I went first, because after hearing Lucinda I realized some other ways I could have responded without the questions.

It kind of reminded me about a principle in art, where the rules - or restrictions - can, instead of hindering creativity, actually enhance, or even inspire, creativity. Not being able to ask a question forced me to pay closer attention to what Lucinda was saying, and then to take a second to formulate a response. It helped me stay focused, and to listen more intently.

I still feel like I take too long in forming a response. I don't think I'm reflecting back what the client said enough. The MI book shows examples where it seems like the counselor repeats back almost exactly what was said to them, and while this seems almost silly, I see how well this may actually work in encouraging the client to give more info.

I again was reminded that I don't know the intents/responses as well as I could. I think about this every time I begin as an observer trying to identify the intents. I think I know what the "spirit of the intents" are, but I don't have them fully committed to memory. And perhaps I should, and perhaps I will. I don't know.